How to ask family not to post your child's photos
These are family boundaries, not a lecture on the law. Relatives usually post because they are proud, not because they mean harm. A short, specific request is easier to follow than a vague plea to "be careful."
Decide what you are asking
Be clear about faces, names, schools, and locations. Say whether you still want to share photos privately. If older posts are the problem, say that too. Do not put the child in charge of preventing misuse.
A first message
Copy and send this as a text, email, or family-chat note:
We're changing how we share photos of the kids. Please don't post pictures or videos that show their faces or include their names, school, or location. We'd still love to share photos with you privately. Thanks for helping us give them more choice about what is online.
A message about existing photos
Could you please save the photos you want to keep privately, then remove the public posts showing the kids? We're making the same changes on our accounts. This is about how we want to handle their privacy going forward.
What to say when someone pushes back
Some relatives hear this as a criticism of the photos they already love. Keep the request about the child's future choice, not about the relative's character.
I know those photos come from a good place. We're not asking anyone to forget the memories. We are asking that the public versions come down, and that new pictures stay in our family thread instead of on a feed.
Private ways to exchange memories
- A family message thread or shared album that is not public.
- AirDrop, email, or a USB stick for grandparents who want prints.
- Prints at a gathering instead of a tagged album.
If your family is comfortable sharing an edited version, cover faces first. That is optional. Many families will simply keep the original in the private thread.
If they refuse to remove a photo
If a request gets you nowhere, you may have a formal privacy-removal route. Our cleanup guide explains GDPR removal requests and complaints in the EU, including a Dutch court case involving a grandmother. The outcome depends on the publication, the applicable law and your authority to act for the child.
Invitations and events
Birthday parties and school events are where extra cameras appear. Add one line to an invitation: please do not post photos that show children's faces. Repeat it kindly at the door if you need to. You cannot control every guest, and you do not have to shame anyone who forgets once. Follow up on the public post if it goes up.
After a public post is removed, check whether copies remain on other accounts.